I am now the proud (also excited and a little scared) owner of this black beauty….
I am excited because it means more autonomy as a street-preacher. Also it means not having to rely on others’ and their equipment which will allow me more freedom. It means that I can now go out during the day time as well as the night. But mainly it’s because owning this little baby is the consolidation and the establishment of a vision God gave me for my life years and years ago….
I remember the first time I ever saw an open-air street preacher. I was walking through the city with my boyfriend (now husband) Matt. We were out for a lovely day, strolling in the sunshine, holding hands. I saw this young guy with black hair standing on a little ledge at the bottom of an Anglican cathedral. He was holding a black Bible and reading from it. There were three gothic youths standing around him listening respectfully. Something about him, about what he was doing, laid hold of me. It made no sense to me whatsoever, that he would stand there and do that, I mean to read from the Bible in public and not care what anyone thought of him was a foreign concept to me. Yet I was drawn to him. I really wanted to stop and listen, but I couldn’t. I don’t know why. My legs just wouldn’t stop. I couldn’t do it. I kept on walking, but I kept looking back. I remember the primary feeling I had for him was respect, because my primary thought “That is something I could never do“.
After many experiences and years had gone by, there was one day when God gave me a vision of myself standing on a busy city street during the day and preaching. Yes, preaching. No one was more astonished at the vision than I was, believe me. It seemed so random that I actually dismissed it from my mind as an impossibility. However I couldn’t dismiss it from my heart, because God had put it there. It kept popping up, and popping up, and popping up until God must have decided that I was especially thick, and He had to make it very clear to me by calling me to go out to the road, (as I’ve detailed in “The Call” post).
So whilst I have been preaching in the city on Friday nights for two and a half years now, to be able to preach during the day is new to me. This Friday, in fact, is when I will be starting this new adventure with a small group of ladies. So it is very exciting that a vision which God gave to me years ago, as of Friday, will be brought into existence.
(I just want to take a moment here to encourage you to hold on to the dream or vision God has given you for your life. And the more of an impossibility it seems to you, the more God will get the glory for it.)
However, it is also very scary to be the owner of this black box. Why? Um, because street preaching is scary. Yes, I still find it scary. I still get the shakes from nerves. I still wonder why I am doing this to myself every time I drive into the city. (That is, until the fire of God begins to burn so deeply within my soul that I just HAVE to preach, have to warn, have to share Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. And the fire burns up the fear of man. It drives away the shakes and the fear…oh my friend – God is good, He will never leave you stranded – just try Him.)
It’s also scary to be entrusted with this responsibility. The black box seems to stare at me from its solid position at my feet as if to say “You do realize that with me also comes more accountability, don’t you? Don’t you take me lightly now….”
I don’t ever want to take it lightly. I want to appreciate more and more every day what my Jesus has done for me and is still doing for me and will continue to do for me. He is my Lord and Saviour, He is my life, He is the reason for my being. He is the love of my life.
Jesus, all for Jesus, all I am and have, and ever want to be…
God bless you